The Womb I Come From

For my birthday today, my 31^st, I thought I’d share the story of my birth and the womb I came from.

Before I landed in my mother’s womb, two siblings came before me. Because of lack of support and shame in Peru, they weren’t able to come all the way through.  So I’m conscious of the life that existed before me in my mother’s womb, and I carry them within me.

When my mother discovered she was pregnant with me, she was thrilled to be in the USA far from her family and able to carry my life in, regardless of the circumstances.  The culture of Peru had been so difficult to withstand that my mother had considered suicide in the past. Here she knew no one would judge her, point out her faults; she’d be able to get ahead with her baby on the way.

At first, she thought she was going to have a boy because people kept commenting that with the size and position of her belly, it showed her baby would be all boy.  Then one day she was walking on the street going home, she was always walking and taking buses. She was coming back from adult school and she found a pink rattle on the sidewalk.  In that moment, she knew she was having a girl.

On Tuesday March 12^th, she went in for her regular check-up and the doctor said she was 2cm dilated, and that she would deliver any minute because that was the due date. But she told me in utero to not be born yet and to wait until Friday or Saturday to come out, she wanted to work the full week so she could have more time off post-partum. Apparently I was a good listener and stayed put.

Saturday March 15th she went grocery shopping to stock up before giving birth. She cooked dinner and ate with her roommates, took a shower around 9pm and went to sleep. At midnight her water broke, she felt the rip of the water bag. She described feeling exhilarated that I was coming; she jumped in the shower. Then she called a taxi cab to take her to the hospital, and she gave him directions all the way there. She was having contractions every 5min, got to the hospital at 2am.

They checked and we were 8cm. Oh my god the baby can be born any minute, my mom wanted her Dr. Tyson, so she waited. They gave her something to poop.  They offered her an epidural when she came back, she said no because she was only going to have one kid, and she wanted to feel what it is like to become a mother.   At 3:40am I was crowning. Her doctor came in sat down, asked her to push, and push again. Then I was born, 3:46am. The doctor said, “What a precious little girl!” We had immediate skin to skin contact and the doctor cut the cord. Mom had to push one more time to get the placenta  out. She says she doesn’t remember the pain.  3hrs and 46 minutes of labor, no childbirth preparation classes. She read books in English and Spanish about birth. She said that this was the beginning of her strength, her will to keep on living, continue to struggle, and the desire to become someone better.  Thanks for choosing to have me mama! Sunday March 16^th @ 3:46am  

Happy Valentine's! Three Tips to Keep Sex Hot After Childbirth

 

  Oh! What an opportunity! Check out this video from Jaiya Ma and Ellen Heed, my colleagues.  They break it down on how to get HOT after having kids.  If you're interested in learning how to help people get their sexy back after birth go to this site and you'll get access to more instructional videos and maybe you'll consider the online course https://rsvp.infusionsoft.com/go/RSVPJV/PGarcia/

COME ON EVERYBODY! Sex is what keeps us going! It's as important as meals!

Birth Doula Story Feb 2009

I had the pleasure of Doula-ing again. This was a first time single mama who's main goal in hiring a doula was to avoid an unnecessary cesarean. Mission accomplished.

The first call was around 1am. She called to let me know that her bag of waters had begun to break.  Water was clear, no foul scent, so she was in the clear to labor at home. No surges as of yet, so she decided to go back to sleep and wait for the surges to come on.

I was definitely on call at this point. I happened to be at the 24hr Korean Spa. Something in me had lead me there, to replenish, refresh, and rest.  Maybe it was the full moon on the 9th. I was definitely in the space to gear up for a day of doula-ing.

At 6am she called to let me know that she was beginning to feel labor. No set pattern of surges just yet, but at least they were not stopping.  Thy were lasting about 30 to 40 sec, and were 6/5/4 minutes apart. I assured her that she was in early labor and to let me know when they got longer and closer together and I'd come to join her.

I went home, packed my doula supplies, and took a nap.  At 9am I called to check in and she was feeling ready to go to the hospital and wanted me to meet her at her home.

I drove to her home and met her in her bedroom. She shared that she had gone on a long walk with her mother the day before and felt that this is what brought on her labor.  Wise move! So we began to talk about her surges, she showed me how she kept track on a website called http://www.contractionmaster.com/  It's such a handy tool!  I could see right off of the bat that she was still in early labor, so I shared with her the pro's and cons of heading to the hospital at that very moment.  She thought of her options and decided to stay home until her surges were at least 60 seconds and within 5 minutes of each other.

To cope with each surge we used different positions. One leg on the bed, like a lunge, then on her hands and knees to relieve the back, slow dancing with pressure on her low-back from her mother. We focused on using the surge to allow opening, I asked her to visualize herself opening with each in breath, taking the breath down to her crotch.  Lots of crotch opening visualization!

She handled each surge earnestly, with fear, with peace, with calmness, with disbelief.  It's amazing the range of emotions and varying degrees of faith in oneself- all a woman goes through in this intense process.  My role is to reassure her strength, never giving up on her power.

Towards the end of laboring at home I suggested that she squat during her next surge. She felt an extreme amount of pressure in her crotch, she expressed that she felt like her pelvic floor was being smashed. She went through about 2 or 3 surges this way. When she got up her surges were stronger than ever.  We went back to the computer to track the next 6 surges. BAM! Out of 8 surges six were well over a minute, and occurring between every 3-5 minutes.  She was beginning to give into the idea that she couldn't do it anymore, that she wanted medication.  So we would focus on just getting through the next one.

We grabbed our things and headed out to the hospital. On the way there her surges were so strong she would tense up and yell out. Limp and Loose became the mantra. Pretty soon she got the hang of her breathing and began to use the energy of yelling out, inward. She began to focus on making deeper sounds and allowing her jaw to open. 

We arrived at the hospital at 12:30p and she was at 7cm. The nurses offered medication (epidural) and she definitely considered it. I just reminded her that she was almost done, and when she's done, she's completely done. I guess it sounded okay for her to continue, and she passed on the drugs.  By 1:30p she was 9.5cm with an anterior lip. I suggested she wiggle her hips around and around to get the cervical lip moved out of the way. At 2pm she was 10cm and ready to push. She pushed until 2:21p and her lovely daughter was born. A healthy girl. 7lbs 8oz, 19 3/4 in. 2/10/09.

Mama was elated that she had accomplished such a challenging feat. She was amazed that she got through it. She was glowing with pride and astonishment.  I was so happy to have been able to assist and be a witness to a woman's natural power.

Full Spectrum Doula Network . org

Laurel Ripple Carpenter reached out and invited me to join the Full Spectrum Doula Network while I was in Australia.  It was so enticing to have a potential community of radically minded doulas come together in a virtual space.  It's something that I had been developing on my own, mostly of Facebook, and in my head.  I was so happy to see it come to life.  Here we are able to find doulas doing prison births, queer allies, transmen doing birthwork, abortion support- just a complete range of leftist, anarchist, women of color, gender non-conforming folks out to connect and build.

It's been a welcoming forum for me where I've been able to share my real life approaches to empowering folks through feminist anatomy education, d.i.y. abortion, self-exam, and networking.  People at FSDN are interested in hands on ways to cause revolution of the mind, body and spirit.  Collectively we are sharing our resources and networking on a national level.  Never before has there been a way to connect in such a concise and purposeful manner.  To me it's part of the shift in feminism where abortion and birth rights are finally one in the same.  Finally, we are manifesting real reproductive justice and putting feminism into motion.

2011

People want to know, what does 2011 look like for Pati Garcia and all her crazy ideas? Well my friends, I'm workin' it out day by day. Since New Moon it's been shaking down rather seamlessly . . . Basically I'll be starting a 5 wks series of workshops related to D.I.Y. Gynecology and Self-Help/Self-Exam, Sexological Bodywork/ Somatic Sex Education, and birth doula. The intent is to have at least 40 people trained and ready to hold informative workshops themselves and spread the word on body autonomy.
I'm definitely planning on being at various conferences, the Anarchist Bookfair LA, UCR's Queer People of Color Conference, Philly's Trans-Health Conference, SisterSong in Miami, and maybe some other ones that might sneak in there.
Also, I'm willing to go where people invite me to go, for example, New York (possibly May into June). It's been a long time coming and in the works to hold workshops there, book individual Sexological Bodywork Sessions, etc. Also planning on running the 5 week workshop in Miami from June through July. The purpose of the 5 weeks is to be able to follow at least one menstrual cycle for uterine size check.
So from this point forward it's all about making the right connections with the right folks who are ready to make this revolution happen.

Receiving Sexological Bodywork- Vaginally and Anally

I had the opportunity to experience a series of sessions with one practitioner. We started with mapping my sacrum and I learned that I was completely numb in my lower left side of my sacrum. The practioner slowly touched each little spot around my sacrum and I could feel various amounts of pressure, release, and pleasure. As she came to the lower left corner I could barely feel her touch. Listening carefully to my own body's non-response, I reached around with my own hand and pinched the left and did not feel pain- I then pinched my right side and I felt the pinch clearly. My heart dropped and my head was full of shock. I DID NOT KNOW I HAD NUMBNESS IN MY OWN BODY. How are we supposed to know if we can't feel something? We don't! And we live our lives day by day in this blindness. This somatic experienced blew me through the roof. I've considered myself pretty self-aware until this moment. I guided my practitioner to apply more pressure in little circles. I could feel sharp tingle down my leg to my toes, a deep relaxation through my spine, neck, face, and cranium- all specifically to the left side.
It's unbelievable how an injury that ocurred when I was 12 years old could still affect me today. The injury was a car accident that sent me flying off my bicycle and landing sideways- this stretched my left knee ligament so much that it almost snapped, so as it healed it created scar tissue in multiple places. I believed I had completely recovered from it when I stopped feeling pain. I havea a suspicion that its ahat is causing me pain in my face near my left upper teeth. I believe it exacerbates my dental work.
I had inner-vaginal mapping done and found that I have considerable tension in the 3p to 6p areaof the pelvic floor. Basically this is the parts that connect to the back left side of my knee, all the way up to my pelvic floor muscles. As my practitoner palpated these spots, I would breathe and the tension would unfurl under her still fingertip. WHen she would go back to the same spot, the tension was gone, so we moved on to the next spot. Little by little this 18 YEAR OLD SCAR was melting.
That evening I experienced my body as a more open vessel. I began to dance to loud music and was acquainted with a new motility in my hips and leg. I could feel my torso elongate. The sexy rolling motion I've been doing on my right side for years, I can now do on my left side with out this little click I used to feel. My breath is fuller, I think clearer now and I think I'm experiencing less anxiety. I feel freedom in my body, I had no idea that I had this much restriction in movement. It's opening me up to more sensations.
I also had the opportunity receive anal mapping and we discovered tight muscles near my tailbone. My tailbone is pulled in and towards the left of my spine.The practioner carefully and slowlycould put her finger on each spot of tension. I would breathe towards that area and again I could feel a stretch all the way to the front of my face. I could even feel a release of tension in my ear.

Australia Sex Bod- Scar Tissue Remediation

While I've been here I had the opportunity to work on a person with scars from a myomectomy (surgery to remove endometriosis). As I began to palpate the abdomen, I sensed so much tension that I went at it quite lightly, feeling around each scar gently. Feeling the underside, topside and right throguh the scars. My mentor Ellen Heed came through and with confidence palpated deeper and the entire abdomen began to release. The client breathed deeply with each stroke and the softening began. I've learned that scar tissue is a disorganization of new collagen, it can start a disease process as the adhesions shorten and weaken the original tissue. Scar tissue may spread inwards where it is not visible and can pull and tug on other organs and body parts, leading to other bodily dysfunction and pain.
The palpation began at the lower abdomen between the public bone and navel. I could feel a ropey thickness in the right fallopian tube. I smoothed it out with castor oil, over and over again. The client noticed that there was a reciprocal sensation in the upperleft side of her abdomen connecting to her ribcage. While palpating the bottom right, I also palpated and stretched the upper left abdomen to complete the unwinding of the scar tissue.
WHen the client sat up, they expressed an immense amount of relief in their back and shoulders, stating that they don't remember being able to sit up so straight without pain. THe clients eyes were much more open and bright then when I first met them.